زندگی زناشویی شما اگر این نشانه ها را دارد مسموم است!!

مجله تفریحی سرگرمی دخترونه

زندگی زناشویی شما اگر این نشانه ها را دارد مسموم است!!

مسایل زناشویی

هیچ انسانی عمدا وارد یک زندگی مشترک غیرموفق نمی‌شود‎

 

شما می‌توانید با پرسیدن سوال‌های زیر از خودتان، متوجه شوید که آیا زندگی زناشویی مسموم و نامطلوبی دارید یا خیر.

 

هیچ انسانی عمدا وارد یک زندگی مشترک غیرموفق نمی‌شود و هر فرد متاهلی هم در طول زندگی‌اش حتما فراز و نشیب‌های مختلفی را تجربه می‌کند. با این ‌حال، تفاوت اساسی‌ای وجود دارد بین مقابله صحیح با مشکلات موقتی و گیر افتادن در یک زندگی مشترک مسموم و ناموفق.

  

آیا عمدتا فریاد می‌زنید و دعوا می‌کنید؟!

زوج‌هایی که همیشه درباره هر موضوعی با هم‌دیگر توافق داشته باشند، واقعا وجود خارجی ندارند. با این‌ حال، نزاع و اختلاف دائمی نیز میان افراد متاهل اصلا قابل قبول نیست و به پیامدهای مثبتی منجر نمی‌شود. اگر دعواهای شما شدید هستند و به استفاده از کلمات تخریب‌گر یا رفتارهای خطرناک ختم می‌شوند، واقعا باید نگران رابطه خودتان باشید.محققان می‌گویند که عادی بودن رابطه در یک روز و بحرانی شدن آن در روز بعدی نیز یکی از نشانه‌هایی است که مسموم بودن و نامطلوب بودن زندگی مشترک را نمایان می‌کند. به ‌علاوه، اگر این موقعیت‌ها به خشونت فیزیکی ختم شوند، باید هرچه سریع‌تر فکری به حال زندگی مشترک‌تان بکنید.

  

آیا دائما به هم‌ دیگر نمره می‌دهید؟!‌

زندگی مشترک نباید به بازی بسکتبال تبدیل شود و افراد متاهل نباید از الگوهای رفتاری مبتنی بر نمره‌دهی و درجه‌بندی برای پیش‌برد زندگی‌شان استفاده کنند. در واقع، اگر فرد متاهلی دائما به شمارش کارهای خوب و کارهای بد خویش و همسرش بپردازد، وارد این چرخه مخرب شده است. محققان می‌گویند که همه افراد متاهل حداقل یک بار به این الگوی رفتاری روی می‌آورند، ‌اما زندگی مشترکی که بر مبنای این الگوهای رفتاری شکل گرفته باشد، قطعا مسموم و نامطلوب است. وقتی که شما یا همسرتان دائما نقص‌ها و ضعف‌های هم‌دیگر را برجسته کنید و خودتان را در جایگاه برتر قرار بدهید، درواقع علیه یک‌دیگر موضع گرفته‌اید.

  

آیا از صحبت کردن درباره مسائل مهم با همسرتان می‌ترسید؟!

جروبحث کردن درباره بیرون بردن زباله‌ها از خانه در این زمینه‌ای که مطرح کرده‌ایم، قرار نمی‌گیرد. درواقع، محققان می‌گویند که اگر شما نسبت به گفتن آن‌چه در ذهن‌تان می‌گذرد، به همسرتان شک و تردید دارید، باید زندگی مشترک خودتان را با دقت بیشتری بررسی کنید. البته به‌ گفته متخصصان، رودررو شدن و صحبت کردن واضح با فردی که همسرمان است و اهمیت خاصی برای‌مان دارد، همیشه کار ساده‌ای نیست. با این ‌حال، وقتی که زوج‌ها تصمیم می‌گیرند برای حفظ و تداوم زندگی مشترک، بعضی از حرف‌های مهم‌شان را پنهان کنند، زنگ خطر آن رابطه به صدا درآمده است.

  

آیا همسرتان فقط به خودش اهمیت می‌دهد؟!

شاید این حالت را در شروع زندگی مشترک متوجه نشوید، اما شخصیت خودشیفته به مرور زمان بیشتر ویژگی‌های خودش را نشان می‌دهد. وقتی که شما با یک فرد خودشیفته زندگی می‌کنید، فقط یک نفر است که در این میان اهمیت دارد و آن یک نفر هم قطعا شما نخواهید بود. فرد خودشیفته تلاش می‌کند تا برای دستیابی به هدف‌های خودش، هم طرف مقابلش را تحت فشار قرار بدهد و هم او را نادیده بگیرد. این افراد عمدتا درباره خودشان صحبت می‌کنند و نسبت به آن‌چه درباره همسرشان می‌گذرد، معمولا واکنش خاصی نشان نمی‌دهند. در واقع، بزرگ‌ترین مشکل در زندگی با فرد خودشیفته، عدم هم‌دلی او با همسرش است.

 

منبع : salamatism.com

 

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